More specifically, can visual studio express accomplish what I am seeking to do. I prefer C++ for its broad application abilities, but am willing to use any language that will work. Also a recommendation of which of these to use:

http://content.gpwiki.org/index.php/Game_Engines

Specifically, what I want is a game that:

-Is a 2D sidescroller with jumping mechanics and gravity, and allows the players to go backwards in the level. The level can elevate or de-elevate as per specific layout of the level.
-Has music constantly playing, level specific.
-Can be tile based, and straight up layout based. Prefer the latter, but will take the former as long as it works.
-Has the player shooting a gun. Several guns exist that the player can get, but resets to the default one upon player death (may not go for the latter in the end if it is deemed annoying, but still)
-Has power ups, they show up at designation points in the level and must be shot out of their capsules.
-Has bosses at the end of every level, with some having mini bosses. The music changes for bosses and sub-bosses.
-Has differing enemies, of course. Some are one-hit wonders, others take several shots.
-The player dies upon being hit, but can get extra lives (may have difficulty settings added in later, with a life bar being added in on all but the hardest setting)
-For now, I'll say it'll have a scoring system, I'll probably ditch it, but may wanna use it at some point.
-(optional) Considering an achievement system, but it isn't critical and will only be added in if practical.
-(optional) IDEALLY, it should use no more processing than an NES game, practically, it should use as little as possible.

I'm confident I can do the coding myself, I just need to know which, if any of the engines from the list I should use, and what language. Also if visual studio express should be able to do it, or if I need to buy a more complete version.

VS Express is more than capable of accomplishing all this.

Personally, I do all of my game development in C# and XNA. There's a platformer starter kit that would probably allow you to quickly do all of this.

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C#/XNA FTW. Gets the job done nice & easy.

Nice, I was optimistic you guys would be able to help, but not THAT optimistic.

I did encounter a problem with the game itself though. It seems to require a "Direct 3D device that supports XNA framework". I should be able to mod it so that it doesn't, right? My only real problem is I wanna make sure if it's the game, or XNA itself giving me the problem, and if either is the case, can I lower the specs?

The good news, it does compile, so once I'm past THIS little problem, I can get to work.

You'll need a graphics card that supports shader model 2.0 but ones that do are at least several years old. Any mid-level machine should do.

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Microsoft XNA MVP

For laptops, do they need to be high-end, or still mid-level? I could probably get a desktop, but it'd be more problematic as I need something I can move around.

What's "mid-level" for a laptop? Mine is several years old and still runs just about any high end game no problem

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Microsoft XNA MVP